A lot of members of my tribe have been messaging how I have been able to rock my festival outfits and how they can attain that kind of confidence. I thought I’d provide some insight as to how I’ve been able to build up my confidence to rock these outfits. I will say there is no clear path and it does take time. I will talk about various things I have done to nurture my mind, body and soul to get me to where I am today. I am still not comfortable in certain pieces, but my confidence will always be a work in progress as I am as a person.
Mind
The mind is a powerful tool within you. It can convince you of the craziest things, but can also get you to where you want to be. When I first started wishing I could wear certain outfits to festivals, I would get sad thinking how I’ll never be able to do it. “There’s no way I can get my body to look good in that. I’ll never be able to be comfortable in an outfit like that. I don’t know how I feel being that exposed.” I kept on making excuses for myself so that I was restricting myself. It felt safe to do that and stick with my oversized t-shirt and fishnets. By me saying I can’t do that or I’ll never be able to do it automatically is setting me for failure. The universe responds to it and confirms yeah you won’t be able to because you aren’t trying
I began to work on my mind and not just in terms of festival fashion but in life. I turned those can’ts and negative thoughts into cans and positive thoughts. I started to tell myself I may not be able to wear that right now, but one day I will. I’m going to workout and nourish my body so I can feel confident one day and rock that outfit. I brought hope into my mind that started the domino effect on my confidence. I took that energy into the gym and into what I eat to produce results.
I know reading this you’re thinking it can’t be that simple, but it really is. You need to work on your inner voice and inner workings first. Rewiring of your brain is a process and I do have my days where I start to doubt myself, but I kept on pushing. I learned I need to go easy on myself and be patient. I am enough and I am doing my best is what I constantly tell myself.
Body
Working out and eating healthy has helped tremendously. I started out my fitness journey back in 2015 where I was working out and eating healthy to lose weight. While I am still trying to lost fat, it’s 2019 and working out and eating healthy has taken on a new role. Working out is a way for me to destress, to feel strong, and to just move. I’m able to get out of my head and do something for ME. I care a lot more about what I’m eating now because I want my body to function how it should because it carries me and my soul day to day. It is so so important to take care of yourself.
I’m not saying you need to go out and lose weight. I’m not saying you need to go to the gym everyday or do crazy diets. I’m recommending you get out there and just move your body even if it’s for an hour a week. Do something to strengthen and stretch your body it’s so so important. I promise dedicated a couple times a week to workout, go to yoga or workout class, you’ll begin to notice a difference in your mindset. Do it for you and your mental state and if you happen to get a nice booty in the process then that’s a bonus too ;).
Soul
Do things that nurture and fill your soul up with goodness. This is where self love and self care really came into play in my life. I say this falls under your soul because self love and care are the most selfish acts you can do for yourself to benefit yourself. When you look after your soul that then helps the rewiring of the mind which will then help the body perform. How I practice self love is by acknowledging I’m doing my best and it’s okay to have off days. I started journaling a lot to get the bad out of my head and to start fresh. I have become more in tune with myself to decide how I’m feeling. I give myself permission to rest when I need it.
Acts of self care can vary from pampering yourself with a face mask and bubble bath, or turning off your phone for a day or even doing things like going for your yearly check up at the doctor and other appointments that are meant to take care of you. Doing things that make you feel good brings in more energy to yourself that will set your mind and body right.
Aside from self love and care, I nurture my soul through meditation, reading, learning something new and doing things that excite me. A combination of these has helped in knowing who I am and what I want. These all don’t directly correlate to boosting my confidence, but they are apart of the equation. These actions make my soul thrive and I can have a clear mind to do what I need to do to fuel my body.
Great Ade, so how can I get started?
If you want to make it a goal to wear a certain type of outfit to a rave or festival, break it down into small and actionable steps to get there. For example, I wanted to start wearing two piece rave outfits, but didn’t feel comfortable. I made it a goal for Crush AZ 2017 that I’d wear one so I took the steps and aimed to workout five times a week and meal prep my meals leading up to Crush. I bought the outfit I wanted as a motivator. I still wasn’t fully comfortable so I bought a large mesh shirt to cover the outfit but have it still be seen. This actually helped in getting me comfortable in being that expose. Each festival until EDC 2017 I wore things that got me a little out of my comfort zone. By EDC, all of my outfits were two piece rave outfits. No more baggy t-shirts. Figure out what’s ideal for you to get to your end goal and keep pursuing it til you get there.
Some final actionable takeaways:
- Be active at least twice a week: find an activity that excites you i.e. gym, spin, yoga, Zumba, etc.
- Eat to fuel your body it’s the vessel that carries you through this crazy life
- Consider journaling to release any frustrations and to begin rewiring negative thoughts to positive ones
- Take time for yourself and give yourself permission to relax when you need it
- Practice self love and care and your mind and body will respond positively
- Remind yourself it’s okay when there’s a bump in the road. Acknowledge it, surrender to it and learn from it. There’s no need to beat yourself up if you didn’t make it to the gym or you gave in and had a slice of pizza. You are enough and you are doing your best.
As always, my door is always open for you guys if you need me. Let me know if you have any questions.
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