Guest Post By Brooklyn Williams (@BK_Raves on Twitter & Instagram)
You all might think I’m crazy from the title of this blog post. And looking back, I have to agree. It all started a few months before Deja Voom, Bassnectar’s first internationally curated festival.
As soon as Bassnectar even hinted at the idea of this event, my ex-boyfriend and I knew we had to go. We are huge bassheads and have traveled far and wide to see the man himself. He deployed in January of last year, and NYE was our last event together before the year-long deployment.
With the announcement of Deja Voom, we decided to make the trip to celebrate his birthday and him coming home from deployment. We set our alarms and purchased the package as soon as they dropped. Deja Voom here we come!
Fast forward to a few weeks before Deja Voom. My ex is home from deployment and we’re geared up and ready for the event. I spent months getting my tropical themed outfits together. I even made sure to cop some Bassnectar Hawaiin shirts for my ex to make sure he was styling as much as I was. We hyped this weekend up as a romantic getaway for the two of us, and this was set up to be my favorite event of the year.
Unfortunately… things don’t always go as planned. We ended up breaking up about two weeks before we planned to go to Mexico. With feelings and emotions flying everywhere, I decided not to go on the trip. It would be too awkward right? What if he ended up flirting with other wook attendees?
As the week went on I began to experience extreme FOMO. This was an event of a lifetime- unlimited drinks, food, and seeing Bassnectar on the beach. My ex was very persistent and wanted me to still come. We sat down for lunch and set down some ground rules if I were to attend. After much consideration, the trip was back on.
I’ll admit that as soon as I saw him again at the airport the feelings I had been attempting to push down came right back up to the surface. There’s just something about a heady man wearing pinecones and trippy clothes that I find so irresistible. Deep down, I was lowkey hoping this weekend could be like old times. Raging together to our favorite artist, meeting new amazing friends together, and cuddling after it was all over. But like I mentioned earlier, things don’t always go as planned.
Our first few hours at the resort were incredible. The resort was filled with fellow bassheads and tequila lemonades everywhere. We checked in to our room and got settled in. After a nice buffet dinner, we went to sleep and prepared ourselves for the wild weekend ahead.
The next day, my ex refused to get out of bed until the merch booth opened (he is very particular about getting exclusive posters at Bassnectar events). Bored, I decided to go down to the pool and meet some bassheads and get my drink on. I’ll admit, the drinks were flowing and I was enjoying myself.
A few hours later I headed back to our room to see if my ex was there. He wasn’t, so my drunk ass decided to take a nap until he got back. When he came back, he was so belligerent drunk that he had lost his phone and wallet and could barely walk. Let me tell you, he really took advantage of those free drinks.
He had brought back a few new friends that I hadn’t met before. When they asked how we knew each other, he loudly exclaimed: “she’s just my ex!”. I’m not sure if it was because we were both drunk, but his comments came off rude to me. It felt like he was upset I was around and that he didn’t want to be around me. His friends asked me if I’d like to go hang out with them, but I was upset and decided not to go.
Drunk, alone in our hotel room, I realized the reality of the situation. I was in a foreign country alone with a bunch of strangers. I won’t sugarcoat this. I am definitely the type of girl to overreact to every situation. I immediately wanted to go home and started looking at flights.
But then, I looked outside at the pool party. Hundreds of
Bassnectar said it best, “To a higher zone, you are not alone”.
When my ex came back to the room, we had a nice long talk about our relationship and the rest of the trip. He apologized for being rude to me and I apologized for overreacting. I decided to stay for the rest of the weekend and he promised to be more considerate towards me.
I won’t deny it. The entire trip was filled with awkward situations. From having to share the bed to not knowing how to explain our relationship. But our mutual love of Bassnectar got us through the weekend.
I ended up spending most of the rest of the weekend apart from my ex. I met so many beautiful souls that weekend that I wouldn’t have met if I decided to go home. The drinks were amazing, the food was delicious, and the sets were incredible. Being by myself forced me to go outside my comfort zone and apart of me feels like I came back a stronger person after the trip.
I don’t know if I would recommend someone going to a festival with their ex. I definitely wouldn’t recommend it if your breakup was as fresh as ours was and the feelings were still there. However, if you guys are friends after the breakup you could probably make it work. Just be sure to set ground rules, respect each other, and realize the true reason you’re there: to enjoy your favorite artists!
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